The Koffee Pot: The Big Yin

Situated in Manchester’s Northern Quarter, The Koffee Pot has been a brunch staple for me during my trips into Manchester for the last few years. They do a mean hot vimto.

Today I’m in and keen to try their take on a full Scottish breakfast. Their misprint of ‘tattie scone’ as ‘totty scone’ on the menu doesn’t fill me with confidence.

My plate arrives, and on first inspection the scran looks good, but scratch the surface and the cracks begin to reveal themselves.

I’ve lived in Scotland for fifteen years, so I know this breakfast quite well. Fried bread is on the plate — something very rarely seen these days as it is essentially a slice of death — even the Scots think it’s a deep fried disaster.

In place of a Lorne sausage is a brick of Cumberland sausage meat. A nice addition, but miles off of what it is trying to approximate.

The tattie scone is present (known as a potato cake in this neck of the woods) and it is unmistakably of Warburtons origin.

The haggis is curious — it is certainly haggis, but the texture is excessively mealy — something I’ve not come across with haggis before.

All else is well with the world; the bacon is crispy, the sausage is juicy and the egg is perfectly fried. No beans though — an odd omission.

If you’re in Manchester, you should go. Try the vimto.